Adultery 103

kaylar By kaylar, 9th Jan 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Guides>Culture>Social Trends

The third in the series on Adultery, this one with a slightly different focus

Recap

In Adultery 101 and 102 I dealt
with the basic parameters of unfaithfulness.

Emphasis was placed on the spouse who is the victim of adultery; the victim, who will be devastated by the knowledge that his or her beloved has brought someone else into the marriage.

In this article I focus on a rather different set of circumstances; that is the
spouse who virtually choreographs the adultery of the other.

Remember the Liverpools?

I wrote a 'short story' (based on facts) of a family surnamed Liverpool

The husband was a full professor who enjoyed the coeds while his wife seemed oblivious to his proclivities. So 'unaware' of what he got on with, she often traveled abroad which gave him more opportunity.

She was a figure of pity to those who didn't know her.

In reality, after marrying the prestigious Dr. Liverpool and being ensconced in the most lavish home in her imagination, she learned he was unfaithful and took solace in the arms of the gardener.

For twenty years she and the gardener have been in love.

When his wife leaves the country to visit relatives abroad, Dr. L. gives the
gardener a vacation. This is to gain privacy when he brings home this semester's winner.

The gardener (unknown to Mr. Liverpool) flies abroad. The ticket is paid for by the money Mr. Liverpool gives his wife to 'get rid of her'. The Gardener joins Mrs. L. and people think he is Mr. Liverpool.

Dr. Liverpool has no idea that his wife has been having a love affair.
It would never occur to him.
He believes he is so clever and his wife is unaware of his relationships.

This situation is not as rare as people might believe.

Money, Status, Power, Oh MY!

When an older man marries a younger woman it is likely there are other factors besides love, (if there is love).

To be coarse, why would a girl who could attract a hot twenty five year old hunk marry a guy older than her father?

We know what he wants; sex, arm candy, a second chance at youth, etc. We know that if he didn't have money, or status, or power, but worked at the corner shop, the bride wouldn't even know his name.

Depending on the age difference, the appearance, the status and power, and of course, the money, the younger woman is not going
to be concerned about his fidelity as long as her status is secure.

In fact, she might even be the 'pimp' who supplies him with nymphs.

Face it, when a woman under thirty marries a man over fifty, in 99.99% of the cases, she has to virtually force herself into the bedroom and its all downhill from
there.

As long as it doesn't effect the Status of the Wife...

Many women who marry rich men older men arrange for him to have sex with
females she selects. These are women who can not threaten her status;
women who could never become the Next Mrs......

She knows where and when and how, and the few dollars he gives his paramour
won't be missed

The Paramour links with the wife so that they can formulate strategies.

The Wife will say; "Can you keep him out until 3 am? My boyfriend and I are planning on driving to....?"

The husband, so full of himself; after all, he's fat and over 50 and his wife is 30, and he's even got a hot 25 year old Mistress! doesn't begin to imagine that Wife has a Lover and Mistress has a boyfriend who lives in the flat he's rented for her.

And Also...

Further, many women don't particularly care for sex.

This is not really shocking considering that unless presented in a particular way
it can be uncomfortable.

Not every man is learned in the Art of Love, especially those whose most attractive
feature is his bank balance.

Many women will marry a wealthy man she knows can't keep his pants on. This is no accident. She wants him to run down go-go dancers, escorts, and other females who are a step above prostitute, (or are prostitutes) as long as he wears a condom it will be ignored.

She is in it for the $$ and depending on the pre-nup or whatever 'time limit' is there,
will stay with him until she qualifies for the $$$ and then launch a divorce and leave.

Hence his 'adultery is desired.

Triple X

Then there is demand for other sexual activities the wife may not wish to
participate in. Some men will, as in Analyze This say;

"I want my wife to do what with the same
mouth she kisses our children?"


and find someone they can ask to do anything.

Many men treat their wives as queens and their girlfriends as sluts. Hence
why should the wife who is nauseated by any but Position One feel
the least bit threatened when he goes out to practice what he's seen in
that XXX movie?

And of course...

Many women are in love with some poor boy who can't even support himself.
When she marries a rich man whom she can encourage in his adulteries, she
can enjoy a romance with the man of her dreams without reference to the
mundanities of life.

Some older men who think sex is the number after five like the arm
candy
and don't care that she's enjoying the Pool Boy. However, If the Pool Boy is disrespectful, he's fired.

Some men who can not father children but need to perpetuate their name or truly
want children will marry and create an arrangement. Far from being upset about his wife's affairs, many are quite comfortable as long as she doesn't make him look ridiculous.

But in Most Cases

In most cases the unfaithfulness of a spouse hurts.

It destroys one's constructs, one's world, and can be totally devastating.
There is no way not to be hurt by a partner's infidelities if one has built a life
around the relationship.

Only if one enters a relationship with the possibility that it might not last, that
the other might be unfaithful, and that giving up 'everything' for marriage
might leave them with nothing, do they develope a kind of armour.

Creating a kind of Adultery Insurance to prevent the victim spouse from losing everything is the best choice.

Tags

Adultery, Affairs, Cheating, Love, Marriage, Sex, Unfaithfulness

Meet the author

author avatar kaylar
I am passionate about history, culture, current events, science and law

Share this page

moderator johnnydod moderated this page.
If you have any complaints about this content, please let us know

Comments

author avatar ppruel
10th Jan 2012 (#)

Can we consider adultery a kind of illness? Your thought here is good ...

Reply to this comment

author avatar kaylar
10th Jan 2012 (#)

The problem is the inability for a person to bond, to be faithful.

Reply to this comment

author avatar 1Faithmorgan
10th Jan 2012 (#)

Interesting. Never thought of it like that.

Reply to this comment

author avatar ittech
10th Jan 2012 (#)

Very well done.

Reply to this comment

author avatar kaylar
10th Jan 2012 (#)

Thank you

Reply to this comment

author avatar Mark Gordon Brown
10th Jan 2012 (#)

Adultery is very sad. It hurts so many people.

Reply to this comment

author avatar kaylar
10th Jan 2012 (#)

It does; and the effects often last a lifetime

Reply to this comment

author avatar Surely confused
3rd Dec 2012 (#)

I just want to say, that all 3 articles, (Adultery 101, 02 and 03) were a great read and thought provoking in many ways. I will say, from the experience of being cheating on not only once, but twice by the same woman/wife, I agree it is not good to believe and say, "My husband/wife would never..." I know and say that, from the first experience of adultery, when I believed just that and lived the consequences of such. But it was those consequences and the experience of my Wife's first betrayal against me, that I gained the "awakening" insight, to never "say never!" Thus, some 19 years later, I entertained the thought that "the store may be indeed closed" and when I discovered that it was, I enacted "plan b" and found one that wasn't. It was definitely a better way to go. Thanks again... for sharing such great insight and knowledge.

Reply to this comment

author avatar kaylar
8th Aug 2013 (#)

The most famous 'last words' is that 'My Spouse would Never.."

Adultery is far more common than one thinks.

Many people don't commit to each other...not really. They marry for the wrong reasons, they don't have a culture behind them to keep them togther...(imagine traditional societies where everyone knows evryone and everyone is always with everyone) when people walk two blocks and are in another world.

As long as one enters a relationship alert to the possibles and deattaches emotions to some extent they won't be devastated

Reply to this comment

Add a comment
Username
Can't login?
Password