Choose The Old-Fashioned Life!

Linda PoitrasStarred Page By Linda Poitras, 8th Nov 2016 | Follow this author | RSS Feed
Posted in Wikinut>Guides>Philosophy>Personal Philosophy

We today live in a world of speed, technology, where everything is accessible. Our parents lived in a black and white time, struggled to get everything and make ends meet yet, family was everything, manners were important, and people knew the meaning of life,courting and romance!

Follow me if you agree and don't forget to bring your coffee!

Good Morning Everybody ...

Ok, this morning I'm feeling perplexed. I've got something on my mind, I'll put it out here and you tell me how you feel about it.

Let's begin: I watch old movies. The thing with old movies is that they show a different way of life which leads to me wonder how did it all go south! Like we're running out of options and it just feels so wrong!

Where are all the men that open doors for us, that pick up the tab, that would rather read a good book then lift weights until their heads explode, that can carry a conversation about something other than themselves? This isn't a lot to ask for guys, it really isn't.

What has happened to the good old fashioned romance? Why are men not bringing flowers, putting on some romantic music and invite us to dance in the middle of the living room or plan a romantic candle light dinner? For those of you who are in a relationship, you courted us to get us and now that you have us, what? Nothing? Your work is done? you can sit on your Lazy Boy and watch TV all night? We were brought in to keep your castle clean, do groceries, pick up after you, do your laundry, put your clothes away, and cook you dinner when you get home from work?

I hate to burst your bubble guys but if you want to be king of the castle, you need to treat your woman like a queen! It's not rocket science! The things that you did to get us are the same things you need to do to keep us! Most of us aren't asking for expensive jewelry, weekends at a hotel with room service. Although nice, some of us just want some love, romance, some attention. We want to know that we are woman not just your maid, cook and cleaner!

To some extent, every woman wants to be romanced

Some more than others. Candle light dinner, soft music in the back ground, looks, holding hands, a man getting up and extending his hand to invite his lady for a dance, swaying, feeling closeness, connection, happy. Others its a night out, a card, a note, a rose, ... its just a sign you thought of us as a woman. It's always nice to hear "I love you" but once in a while you need to show that love. Words are empty without actions.

A compliment once in a while isn't going to kill you guys ... I promise.

Serious questions:

~~ Does it make you feel like less of a man to be attentive?
~~ Do you not realize that giving that kind of attention would make you more of a man?
~~ More then that even: it would make you her man. You know, the woman your with?

It seems that the gestures have been put aside

Men have stopped the gallantry because they are too busy. That's it, people are too busy. Society has changed. Everything is so high speed, no one takes time for the simple pleasures in life anymore. Which, when you think about it, is one of the reason why people get so depressed, burnt out, irritated, distant, angry ... they don't see anything good in their lives so they give up.

This generation has no idea about the concept of romancing

That's not what they learn from the music they listen to, the movies they watch or the video games they play. It's all about angry, street rap or heavy metal, hard rock, and sex song which is confusing romance with physical pleasure, love for lust. What about the romance novels we read, what is the romance part in the books? The foreplay before sex. Sex is fun but it isn't romance and it sure isn't love either. People can have sex without even loving or knowing someone.

Back in the days ...

The way of life was simpler and slower then it is today. People appreciated more. There was etiquette, grace, gallantry, respect, meaning to life. They took time. Now, if a woman in the passenger seat waits for the man to open the door for her, the man looks at her with this: 'What are you waiting for? Get out already!' expression on his face.

Is it just me or was it the romancing that kept couples together back in the days?

It wasn't so long ago that couples, after putting the kids to bed, would just spend time together, eat a cozy dinner in candle light, and danced a bit in the living room, talk about their day ... I know my parents did. Now when you talk about wanting that you get told you are daydreaming or living in a fantasy world.

Couples had a song together. That special song that when they heard it play on the radio or put the record on, it brought a smile to their face and that special look and feeling of love and remembrance.

Today, those notions are seen as old fashioned, boring and lame. Outdated. That is sad.

The problem today is ...

You want to watch a movie today in the romance category and its about how fast you can jump into bed with someone. There is no more waiting to see if there is any care or love, there's no more mystery, feelings, longing, desiring someone. Why wait? People think that because there is physical attraction that it means they have to act on it. They have no clue that there is more to it then that.

School system is in a hurry to teach Sex Education and they just about made sex to be meaningless in the sense that it isn't special anymore or reserved to the person they love. It is just a means of quickly showing children that girls can get pregnant if they have unprotected sex and therefore need to be practicing sex in order to avoid sexually transmitted diseases and unwanted pregnancies. The casualty of sex has shown young people that it's ok to start having sex at the age of 13 and younger.

When I was 13, I was still playing with my friends and just being a kid.

Now you have young mothers at 13 or 14. They will never get their childhood back. Sex has become nothing more then self-gratification and it has pushed romance out the window. It is no longer a demonstration of love.

In my little world ...

I would like to have a romantic dinner, candles, flowers, a quiet adult conversation with soft, good old fashioned music in the back ground, slow dancing, kissing, holding, ... just enjoying each other's company, the closeness. Remembering why I fell in love with the man I'm with.

Then I wake up ...

Sad part is ... I don't think it's coming back!

The songs and the movies playing nowadays are not conducive to that kind of notion.

Love is dying and is being replaced by lust and lust dies very quickly. People get tired of being together, they get so wrapped up in themselves, their work, money, that when they get home, they don't stop, slow down, look around, and see the love of their life across the room doing homework with the children or preparing dinner or setting up the dinner table. There is no more: "Honey, I'm home!" ... smiles ... kiss ..."How was your day?" ... "Tell you what, let's put the kids up early tonight and you can tell me all about it."

The reality is ...

You walk on the street and you know that if a couple is holding hands, holding each other by the waist, they are in a new relationship. Unless you see this older couple, then you see so much more to the holding of hands. You see a couple holding on to each other, you see love.

Ok, here is MY theory ...

Love is possible in this day an age but people need to nurture that love. Love, like a flower, needs attention. People need to slow down, take a deep breath, and decide to take those little gestures toward one another, take time to remember why they fell in love in the first place. The stress and the daily grind can be put on hold for a bit because there are things just as important to tend to. Chose to talk, to listen, to eat together, to pay attention to one another.

Put on some Tony Bennett, Dinah Washington, Etta James, ... or whatever slow, calm, relaxing music you like on the radio and remember each other. Romance each other.

It's not rocket science guys

It really isn't. You used to do it! You told her how you felt about her. You treated her like a queen. You showed her affection. You did! Why not pick it up once in a while for the sake of reminding each other why you came together in the first place?

Think about this for a moment ... you think it might just make all the hard work and daily stress worth the effort because you have a love, a family, someone special at home that waits for you and only you at the end of it all?

At the end of the day, no matter how bad your day was, you can actually have something good to look forward to, enjoy, smile, and realize you have happiness.

Something to think about ...

Time for the pick of the day ...

Today my pick is for us girls ... All Woman by Lisa Stansfield

I wish you all a good day. Be good to one another and don't take your freedom for granted because it's not a given for everyone to do so.

SMILE! ... don't forget what you are because you're on life's candid camera!


Courting, Dating, Dating Advice, Dating Tips, Life, Life Experiences, Life Journey, Life Lessons, Life-Style, Lifestyle, Man, Manners, Old Fashioned, Relationship, Relationship Help, Relationship Tips, Relationships, Relationships Dating, Relationships Love, Respect, Romance, Romantic, Vintage, Vintage Wedding, Woman

Meet the author

author avatar Linda Poitras
I was born and raised in Montreal, Quebec. In 2004 I married my American Mr. Man and 2 years later we moved to isla Margarita, Venezuela

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