Daydreaming and Bucket Lists: Conquering the 5 Big Excuses, Part 2 - Modify and Make it Happen

MarilynDavisatTIERS By MarilynDavisatTIERS, 30th Oct 2013 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL
Posted in Wikinut>Guides>Personal Development>Self-awareness

Do you daydream or have a bucket list? How many things have you actually gotten to do on your list? Ever thought of modifying them, not just giving up on them.


In Part One, Daydreaming and Bucket Lists: Conquering the 5 Big Excuses, the Top 5 excuses were:

1) There is not enough time; I will do it—someday
2) I have to work; I cannot have an adventure
3) I am too old
4) I do not have the money for those big dreams
5) I do not know how to get my obligations done and still have money for dreams

Examining the Excuses

1) There is not enough time; I will do it—someday.

Regardless of where you live on this planet, you have the same 24 hours that every other person has.

Each of us has personal and professional responsibilities, and once they are satisfied, there is discretionary time. How you spend your unrestricted or flexible time, is a choice - being stuck, having an adventure, or wasting it.

2) I have to work; I cannot have an adventure

Most people get a yearly vacation or a long weekend sometime during the year.

Deciding that you can squeeze in some variation of your bucket list during one of these times may help it feel more like an adventure.

Always wanted to climb a mountain? None near you? See if a family trip to an area with a reasonable hiking trail would satisfy both your inner Sherpa and your young son trying to get a Boy Scout badge.

3) I am too old

Certainly, we are too old for some youthful dreams – an Academy Award Winning performance; a Singer/Drummer/Guitarist is a famous rock band, or a professional baseball player.

Explore options for local theater productions. Is part of the reason you never pursued acting because you have stage fright?

Then see if painting sets, singing in the chorus or a non-speaking part would not satisfy your inner Barrymore, Pitt, or Chaplin.

Know a lot about baseball and even played as a high school student? See about coaching Little League. They will not know you never played at a stadium and your knowledge could help develop the next Babe Ruth.

Wanted to form that band, but never learned to sing, play or know what a Zildjian is?

Explore options for taking lessons. You may find that singing in the shower at the top of your lungs, or twanging out a soulful melody or learning to really multi-task with hands and feet keeping time to some classic drumbeats is enough.

Overcoming the $ Issue

4) I do not have the money for those big dreams and 5) I do not know how to get my obligations done and still have money for dreams

One of the simplest ways to stretch the dollar is to look for bargains, coupons, or sales on items we typically use weekly. I was not a coupon clipper until I went shopping with a friend who got two grocery carts full of food for her family and spent less than I usually did for considerably less items.

Also, check out Google and Bing for ways to be frugal. Many people confuse frugal with cheap. My friend was not purchasing dented cans or mystery meats; she was purchasing name brands.

When we got to the car, she told me that she was now going to put the $107.89 that she saved on groceries into the vacation fund.

Sometimes, it is about making better decisions and spending a little extra time to shop wise and save more for the dream. Her family participates in coupon night because they all recognize the importance of saving for the vacation.

Real Life Modifications

Money or lack of it, time and age are all determining factors in making a dream a reality. However, sometimes modifying the dream or your list can get you close to the intent and that is enough.

A friend and I were talking several years ago, and he said, “I’m tired of dreaming, I want to be doing.” When I asked him what he wanted to be, he said a writer.

Later in our conversation, I asked what it would take to fulfill his dream of writing. He gave me a whole list of things –publisher, literary agent, and good press reviews. We agreed that if he were a published writer, with a substantial following, he might have those things.

I then asked him if he had any idea how the great writers – Shakespeare, Wolfe, and Hemingway all started out. He replied that he did not; I told him that they committed to putting pen to paper and letting their hands record what was in their heads and hearts.

Then all of them needed help; they gave their newest creation to someone with a critical eye to edit; make it more accessible to the public and play devil’s advocate with the confusing or too lengthy passages.

Wolfe had his Maxwell Perkins, Shakespeare his William Malone, and Hemingway, well, he was fortunate, his fourth wife, Mary was readily available, when Maxwell Perkins was busy with other authors.

Putting Effort into a Dream or Bucket List

After we talked, he made the effort to write. Submitting articles and to publishing houses; accepting rejection or negative comments from some, and sometimes feeling discouraged.

In other words, practicing and learning his craft.

Today, this man is a published author of a book of poetry. No, it is not likely to gain him a top slot on the New York Times Bestseller list, nor going to let him buy the mansion on the lake, but he is a dedicated to his passion, personally fulfilled, writer, and he has recently joined Wikinut at my suggestion. Please check out William Power.

Change the Name, Change the Impression

My mother grew up on a farm in Indiana. She had an opportunity to live with a family while she was in school during World War II. The husband was English and had lived in Europe during his early twenties.

She accompanied the family on a trip to New York City and as she put it, “Gawked her way down 5th Avenue.”

At a French restaurant, she ordered the Vichyssoise soup as it was one of few words she had heard someone else say. She thought ordering it would be easier than struggling through so many other unfamiliar words.

Years later when she served us “plain old-fashioned potato soup”, she would dress it up by saying it was "Le Hot Vichyssoise" or Soupe de pommes de terre.

To this day, give me a bowl of potato soup made with butter, carrots, onions, and just the right amount of pepper along with good crusty rustic bread and I am transported to my European place.

Improvising on My Own List

So what exotics and expensive things might I add to my bucket list? My oldest daughter is a graduate of Johnson and Wales, and was on the United States Culinary Olympic Team – I know you did not know we had one – however, we do, so expensive food is, if not enjoyed, at least talked about in our family.

I could take a lesson from Carter's friend from the movie, The Bucket List. Edward, a coffee aficionado drinks Kopi Luwak, also known as civet coffee. It is the world’s most expensive coffee with retail price of $700 per kilo.

I would never leave out the sweets, so here is the most expensive sundae in the US, the Golden Opulence. It is a $1000 ice cream sundae.

The Serendipity describes the Golden Opulence Sundae as follows:

“5 scoops of the richest Tahitian vanilla bean ice cream infused with Madagascar vanilla and covered in 23K edible gold leaf, the sundae is drizzled with the world’s most expensive chocolate, Amedei Porceleana, and covered with chunks of rare Chuao chocolate, which is from cocoa beans harvested by the Caribbean Sea on Venezuela’s coast.

The masterpiece is suffused with exotic candied fruits from Paris, gold dragets, truffles and Marzipan Cherries. It is topped with a tiny glass bowl of Grand Passion Caviar, exclusive dessert caviar, made of salt-free American Golden caviar, known for its sparkling golden color. It’s sweetened and infused with fresh passion fruit, orange and Armagnac”.

Atlanta to Las Vegas - Who am I Kidding?

I Understand the Excuses

Researching for this, I really would like to try that sundae; however,

1. I do not have the time to drive the approximately 30 hours and 17 minutes in good traffic
2. I have three paying articles due by Friday
3. At 66, I may be too old to be daydreaming about sundaes
4. I do not have $1000 to spend on a sundae, anyway
5. My truck would not make it to Vegas, but it can make it to the Dairy Queen

Conquering My Own Excuses

Therefore, I am going to take an hour-long break, drive the 7 miles to the Dairy Queen, spend $8 on a hot fudge sundae, and remember being a kid.

Oh, and knock one more thing off my modified bucket list.

Stage Painting: Morgue Files
Golden Opulence Sundae: Wikipedia
Map: Google Maps

For additional articles by Marilyn Davis:

Each person has a unique voice and Wikinut is a place for you to share your wisdom, humor, insight and knowledge.

Join, write and become connected to others who share a passion for writing, supporting one another, and learning.


Conquering Excuses, Make Dreams Happen, Making Dreams Happen, Modifying Bucket Lists, Overcoming Obstacles For Bucket List

Meet the author

author avatar MarilynDavisatTIERS
A Certified Addiction Recovery Empowerment Specialist, with 25 years of abstinence-based recovery. I write about addictions, recovery, life lessons and general writing tips.

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author avatar MarilynDavisatTIERS
30th Oct 2013 (#)

Good afternoon, Mark. Thank you for moderating this page. ~Marilyn

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author avatar Mariah
30th Oct 2013 (#)

Impressive, positive and upbeat write Marylin, been waiting for part 2 and wasn't disappointed.
Being the master of our own destiny is ours for the taking,
if, as you say, we eradicate the very common, familiar and negative excuses highlighted.
Thought provoking, and a definite encouragement in the right direction.
Think I might pass on the 1,000 dollar ice cream sundae..oh I would feel so guilty that I wouldn't enjoy it ha ha.
I'll look in on William Power too. Thank you for a great share.

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author avatar MarilynDavisatTIERS
30th Oct 2013 (#)

Good afternoon, Mariah. Thank you very much for the kind words. That $8 sundae was all I needed :). I'm rather like you, I would not enjoy a sundae that cost that much, either. ~Marilyn

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author avatar Connie McKinney
30th Oct 2013 (#)

Marilyn, hope you enjoyed that sundae! Thanks for sharing such good advice. Now, I have to go and see what's on my bucket list and how I can modify it.

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author avatar MarilynDavisatTIERS
31st Oct 2013 (#)

Good evening, Connie. I also figured that the expensive sundae was probably not served with a plastic spoon, so took one of my grandmother's sterling teaspoons and pretended to my heart's content. :) ~Marilyn

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author avatar Phyl Campbell
31st Oct 2013 (#)

Cute (re: sundae)! And William Power must be so lucky!! I will check him out at your suggestion.
I've changed a lot of bucket list things to manageable goals. There are still things I want, but I'm better off for having followed some of these suggestions... But it's amazing what others see that you don't see for yourself. So I'm glad you shared!

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author avatar MarilynDavisatTIERS
31st Oct 2013 (#)

Good evening, Phyl. Thanks for the encouraging words. ~Marilyn

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author avatar Fern Mc Costigan
5th Nov 2013 (#)

Nice post!

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author avatar MarilynDavisatTIERS
5th Nov 2013 (#)

Good morning, Fern. Thanks for reading and commenting. ~Marilyn

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