Why We Get Angry On The Ones Whom We Love Most?

A K Rao By A K Rao, 15th Jul 2012 | Follow this author | RSS Feed | Short URL http://nut.bz/591ttvlb/
Posted in Wikinut>Guides>Philosophy>Personal Philosophy

Why we often get angry on the people whom we love most? Have you ever given a thought about it? Please read on to add your views...

Love and Hate Are Two Extremities Of The Emotions!



Love and anger are two extreme states of emotions.

We tend to get angry with a person whom we really love and whom we really care for! We never can have anger for a stranger!

If some one close to us, may it be, either our own family member or friend, hurt us then we obviously would have anger against him/her. And we get uneasy and irritated until the things are not settled!

Why We Get Angry On The Loved One?



Here if we carefully analyze the reason of our getting hurt, we will come out with some interesting findings!

This is in fact a possessiveness and take it granted attitude of ours towards the person in question which we never realize!

We unknowingly develop a confidence on the loved ones and start taking them granted and we always want them to behave in a manner where we stay always happy with them.

Jealousy Is The Main Reason!



But then have we ever realized that these things lead to jealousy and envy against the person if we feel that he/she is not paying sufficient attention to us as expected!

And this leads to frustration, dejection and ultimately to the anger! The fact is that we can’t digest the fact that some one else is getting more attention from the person whom we love than us! This makes us unhappy and angry too!

Give Space Of Freedom To Your Loved One!


Thus I think Possessiveness, insecurity and the take it granted attitudes are the main reasons for one to be jealous and to become angry about a person whom we really love!

So be careful about this aspect and let your loved ones be given a space of freedom to have their own life than just adoring you every time!

Believe me if you become slight considerate in this aspect, there will be a lot of changes in your temperament and attitude towards your loved ones to have an enjoyable life!

You will be happier with him/her and won’t get angry easily! Do you agree with me?


PS: The pictures used in the Article have ben taken from Google search. I sincerely convey my thanks for that.

Tags

Adore, Anger, Freedom, Jealous, Love, Posessive, Take It Granted Attitude

Meet the author

author avatar A K Rao
I am an Equnie Vet by profession specialised in Thoroughbreds!

Writing is my passion. Have been a free Lance Journalist and Cartoonist in late80's and early 90's in Local and National News Papers of India.
I also write on:
http://mypage5.com/p....(more)

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Comments

author avatar Ramalingam
16th Jul 2012 (#)

We get angry with those people whom we love much.

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author avatar A K Rao
16th Jul 2012 (#)

Yes, dear Ramalingam,we care for them and that is the root cause leading to many complications! Thanks !

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author avatar Sivaramakrishnan A
16th Jul 2012 (#)

We need to get angry for the right reasons. I show slight annoyance and displeasure to make my point. But I give full freedom to them, more than I expect to be given! siva

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author avatar A K Rao
16th Jul 2012 (#)

That is so generous of you sir! Maximum problems get solved if we are bit considerate! Thanks for responding!

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author avatar Ravitejatadimalla
16th Jul 2012 (#)

To get angry at someone, first we have to be very close and free with them. And we can be that way mostly with our loved ones.

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author avatar A K Rao
16th Jul 2012 (#)

That is crux of his article dear Ravi! Thanks For commenting!

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author avatar Delicia Powers
16th Jul 2012 (#)

very interesting thoughts, well said A K...

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author avatar A K Rao
16th Jul 2012 (#)

Thanks Dear Delicia for reading and commenting!

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author avatar SunnyJasrotia
16th Jul 2012 (#)

I also feels like that..Insecurity is also have some affect on anger...Thanks..

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author avatar A K Rao
16th Jul 2012 (#)

Yes, of course you are right! Thanks sunny for commenting!

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author avatar Zhi Han Chew
17th Jul 2012 (#)

I am almost agreed with you, yet I have 1 question for you: Is this phenomenon happening for the people you don't love, but 'like'?

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author avatar A K Rao
18th Jul 2012 (#)

May be you are right,after all there is a thin line of demarcation between the two1 Thanks for responding!

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author avatar Denise O
18th Jul 2012 (#)

I think my daughter summed it all up for me and ever since she said this to me, I have looked at it differently...
When I asked my daughter why she was mad at me, as I did not do to her, what she was angry about and after she finally said what was bothering her, it had not a thing to do with me so, I asked her again...
Krys, why take it out on me and she responded "Mama, I know it is not fair but, I know that no matter what you as my mother will always love me and that is not a chance I can take with others. This then made me stop to think it over and you know what, I understand and I try not to get hurt if she blasts me, as I just know she is hurting and she needs to lash out on someone, why not it be her mother, her safety net. Now as far as my hubby, I too try to keep this in my mind when he does the same. Nice read. Thank you for sharing.:)

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author avatar A K Rao
18th Jul 2012 (#)

She is absolutely right! She can take you granted and say anything to you in the capacity of a loving and caring daughter! What she said is absolutely correct and I respect her feelings and regard your maternal instict! God Bless! Thanks !

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author avatar siddhinfo
18th Jul 2012 (#)

This is because we feel that it is our right to do so

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author avatar A K Rao
18th Jul 2012 (#)

Yes, you are right dear siddhinfo! Thanks for responding!

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author avatar Retired
19th Jul 2012 (#)

When I get angry at my husband, I take 10 minutes to myself, then go back in the room and look at him, and I then often wonder...why was I angry? It is usually over something petty and stupid anyway. Life is too short for anger.

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author avatar A K Rao
19th Jul 2012 (#)

That is so nice of you doing that dear Jenny! Thanks for responding!

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author avatar Tranquilpen
20th Jul 2012 (#)

Ditto Denise's comments, I can not add anything to that. Thank you for sharing.

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author avatar A K Rao
20th Jul 2012 (#)

Thanks a lot dear Tanquilpen for the comment! You said every thing without saying anything! i liked it!

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author avatar Souvik
21st Jul 2012 (#)

Very interesting article. Thanks for sharing it.
Souvik Chatterji

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author avatar A K Rao
21st Jul 2012 (#)

Thanks a lot dear sauvik for commenting!

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author avatar yugasini
21st Jul 2012 (#)

hi A K Rao,

that is common, where is there is love there is some quarrel also,have a nice day

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author avatar A K Rao
21st Jul 2012 (#)

Yes, it is out of love we get the anger on a person if he/she not com up to our expectations!! Thanks!

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author avatar Amruta Jadhav
24th Jul 2012 (#)

Nice write up and very good insight...and I completely agree with you giving space to one another is the key ingredient for any healthy relationship!

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author avatar A K Rao
24th Jul 2012 (#)

Thanks a lot for your reading and encoraging comment dear Amruta!

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author avatar Sandralee
4th Aug 2012 (#)

Well pondering this I feel that with the amount of reading that I have done in my life I have made it a point to be secure enough to try to avoid these types of conflict. Retaliation and overbearing- ness in a relationship will ultimately destroy all you try to change to the way of ones own thinking. Giving space for them to process and make the determination to ask for help is a trait that lacks in a lot of human morals. There is a stigma to society and a lot of education to be had from reading what you share. Another good read thank you.

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author avatar A K Rao
4th Aug 2012 (#)

Thanks alot dear Sandra for your thoughtful comment! Yes I agree with you most of us act impulsively without thinking the long term effects on relationships while deaing with some emotinal things in life! We need to have some maturity at this level together with lot of patience! Thanks for lovely comment!

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author avatar yugasini
17th Aug 2012 (#)

hi A K Rao,

very nice post,have a nice day.

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author avatar A K Rao
17th Aug 2012 (#)

Thanks Dear Yugasini!

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author avatar deepa venkitesh
8th Sep 2012 (#)

omg, I became scared of the jealousy monster, thanks, I am always having such experiences because as you pointed out they maybe jealous of me(lol) Bookmarking each article of yours, my son will love to read the one on coin collections.

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author avatar A K Rao
8th Sep 2012 (#)

Thanks a lot dear Deepa for your wonderful comment! I am honoured! Have a nice time!

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author avatar Ptrikha
8th Jan 2013 (#)

Sometimes, we show some emotions without thinking much, and at times those emotions are a result of something else. Still, we need to control anger at our near ones.

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